Today I spent some time looking through those verses that contain that phrase “Whoever loses his life for me”. My NIV note says that Jesus is quoted as saying this 7 times in the Gospels and no other saying of His is given such emphasis.
This is one of those verses that would make it into the letter from Jesus to me. He has been bringing it up for years. And years.
Today this one from Matthew 16:25 in the Amplified hit me between the eyes:
“Whoever is bent on saving his [temporal] life [his comfort and security here] shall lose it [eternal life] and whoever loses his life [his comfort and security here] for My sake shall find it [life everlasting].”
Then while reading some commentaries I happened upon this: “Rejoice in your afflictions and glory in them.” I could not find a verse that says exactly that but 2 Cor 12:9-10 where Paul says he is proud to boast of all his weaknesses; the one about the thorn in the flesh and when I am weak He is strong, sure has the gist of it.
I was very convicted. Comfort and security are what I hold onto tenaciously and I hear Him telling me that this is keeping me from receiving the “life” He has for me.
Every morning I wake up in pain. I am never free of pain. Sometimes it is blissfully mild, other times it is wicked. I hate it. I want it gone. I’ve cried out more than three times. I refuse to accept what He says. (Leave it all quietly to God, my soul, my rescue comes from Him alone.)
I’ll try anything to get rid of it. I am a fool. I am indeed “bent on” protecting my “comfort and security.”
Today He said, “Rejoice in your afflictions and glory in them.” This is not the “In the midst of all things give thanks” genre, but the “For all things” kind. He seriously means I am to rejoice when I wake in pain. I am so bummed. Cuz ya know what that makes me think? If I do that, He’ll send more! It’s like giving up the fight. Resignation. That makes me think of Hinds Feet – Acceptance with Joy. Crud.
At any rate, I write to ask for prayer. I cannot do this. I know that He is 100% willing to do it for me. I need faith. I need grace. I need strength.
Matthew Henry again on the Matt 16 verse: Self-denial and patient suffering are hard lessons which will never be learned if we consult with flesh and blood, let us therefore consult with our Lord Jesus.
Pray for me please.
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Praying for you in the wee hours this a.m., this was my immediate reading. I thought it timely and though lengthy, worth much. I pray it for you now, along with Is 50:7 and the petition to increase your faith. XO
I do not pray that you may be delivered from your pains, but I pray God earnestly that He would give you strength and patience to bear them as long as He pleases. Comfort yourself with Him who holds you fastened to the cross. He will loose you when He thinks fit. Happy those who suffer with Him. Accustom yourself to suffer in that manner, and seek from Him the strength to endure as much, and as long, as He shall judge to be necessary for you. The men of the world do not comprehend theses truths, nor is it to be wondered at, since they suffer like what they are, and not like Christians. They consider sickness as a pain to nature, and not as a favor from God; and seeing it only in that light, they find nothing in it but grief and distress. But those who consider sickness as coming from the hand of God, as the effect of His mercy, and the means which He employs for their salvation—such commonly find in it great sweetness and sensible consolation.
I wish you could convince yourself that God is often (in some sense) nearer to us, and more effectually present with us, in sickness than in health rely upon no other physician; for, according to my apprehension, He reserves your cure to Himself. Put, then, all your trust in him, and you will soon find the effects of it in your recovery, which we often retard by putting greater confidence in physic than in God.
Whatever remedies you make use of, they will succeed only so far as He permits. When pains come from God, He only can cure them. He often sends diseases of the body, to cure those of the soul. Comfort yourself with the sovereign Physician both of soul and body.
I foresee that you will tell me that I am very much at my ease, that I eat and drink at the table of the Lord. You have reason: but think you that it would be a small pain to the greatest criminal in the world, to eat at the king’s table, and be served by him, and notwithstanding such favours to be without assurance of pardon? I believe he would feel exceeding great uneasiness, and such as nothing could moderate, but only his trust in the goodness of his sovereign. So I assure you, that whatever pleasures I taste at the table of my King, yet my sins, ever present before my eyes, as well as the uncertainty of my pardon, torment me, though in truth that torment itself is pleasing.
Be satisfied with the condition in which God places you: however happy you may think me, I envy you. Pains and suffering would be a paradise to me, while I should suffer with my God; and the greatest pleasure would be hell to me, if I could relish them without Him; all my consolation would be to suffer something for His sake.
I must, in a little time, go to God. What comforts me in this life is, that I now see Him by faith; and I see Him in such a manner as might make me say sometimes, I believe no more, but I see. I feel what faith teaches us, and, in that assurance and that practice of faith, I will live and die with Him.
Continue then always with God: it is the only support and comfort for your affliction. I shall beseech Him to be with you. I present my service.
I am,
Yours…
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"The Eleventh Letter" in The Practice of the Presence of God by Brother Lawrence
I am ministered to and blessed, both by you and Brother Lawrence, all of course from Him. Thank you, my friend, for loving me so.
Just read the blog, 11/11. I know you are working these things through and that God is ministering to you, training you, telling very important and wonderful things. You are loved. T
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